Do You Actually Belong in the Elizabethan Era?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
Do You Actually Belong in the Elizabethan Era?
Image: Yuri_Arcurs / E+ / Getty Images

About This Quiz

The Elizabethan era took place during the reign of Elizabeth I, the daughter of Henry VIII (who killed her mother over the fact that Elizabeth was not a boy and had no siblings). It was a time of contrasts. On the one hand, it was a great time, when optimism was high, Shakespeare was writing, and if they had understood the concept of GDP at the time, it was essentially 45 straight years of growth. Slavery was illegal, and contrary to modern opinion, people were pretty relaxed about sexual mores (especially as compared to their Puritan descendants).

Tudor times resulted in a great increase in the power of England: it saw the earliest expansion into what became an empire, set up the union with Scotland a hundred years later, and even planted the seeds of what became the English Civil War, which transformed the nation into a democracy a mere 60 years later.

However, the idea of democracy would have been seen as very radical in this late Tudor period. Elizabethan England was a police state, where Good Queen Bess' spymaster, Francis Walsingham, watched for sedition and Catholics were burned at the stake. Censorship was rife, and torture was not just legal but likely. Waves of plague and war swept over Europe, and average life expectancy was absolutely dire.

How would you have fit into this time? Would it have been a disaster, or would you have found royal favor and success? Tell us a little bit about yourself, and we'll find out! We may not compare thee to a summer's day (even if thou art, in fact, more lovely and more temperate), but we shall compare thee to a typical citizen of the Elizabeth era. Scroll with thy mouse, and thou shalt find out!

Are you fond of horses?
I love them and I know how to ride them and care for them.
Yes, and I know a bit about horses.
In theory, but I don't know anything about them.
I hate horses.
What's your idea of a great night out?
A play at the Globe
Go see a movie
Go to dinner
I don't like going out.
Do you wear glasses?
No, my eyes are perfect.
Only for driving
Only for reading
Yes, huge thick ones

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How many books do you read per month, roughly?
I don't really like to read.
Just one
Two or three
Four or more
Do you know any foreign languages?
Yes, many including Latin
I know Spanish and French.
I know some German.
No
Do you mind biting your lip about political or religious things?
I don't care about those things.
I'm happy to keep it out of the public eye.
I could learn.
I could never do that.

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Do you get cold easily?
No, I am a furnace.
I'm usually comfy.
I can do.
Yes
How do you feel about the dominance of Spain?
I'm for it!
I like Spain, so that is cool.
I think Spain should not be too powerful.
Countries should leave each other alone.
Can you cook from scratch?
Yes, and I grow all my own veggies.
Yes, though I don't know about seasonal veg and that sort of thing.
I make a few things.
No, that is witchcraft to me.

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Could you live without potatoes (at first)?
I hate potatoes!
Sure, if I had to
I would be very sad.
My beloved potatoes would have to be pried from my cold hands.
How do you feel about Francis Walsingham, spymaster and disappearer of the Queen's enemies?
I think he's not just awesome, he's right.
He's probably someone you could bribe.
He's scary.
That dude was a psycho!
What gift might you give the Queen to get on her good side?
A cubanelle pepper, as she will have never had one
Some land
A horse
Tooth floss

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Have you read the Bible?
Yes, many times, and I learn more each time.
Yes, once
Mostly
Only snippets
What modern gizmo could you absolutely not live without?
I hate modern gizmos.
Hairdryer
Phone
All of them
Does the idea of traveling by ship excite you?
Yes!
It's a little scary but I'm into it.
It's mostly scary.
No, I am not insane.

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How important is it to you to be able to date whoever you like?
I am straight and married, so I'm good never to date again.
I am in a discreet open marriage, so I already can!
I would like to be able to date.
I want to date who I please, when I please, forever!
Do you know first aid?
Yes, and I'm also a trauma surgeon.
I know enough to survive well in the wilderness.
I have a few basics.
I know nothing about such matters.
Can you identify which plants are safe to eat?
Yes, I took a course.
I know which mushrooms not to eat if that counts!
I know nettles sting.
No idea

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How is your immune system, generally speaking?
Solid as a rock
Pretty good
Poor
I have multiple immune issues.
Does the prospect of a chamberpot or privy scare you?
It doesn't bother me.
It's a little weird.
That's icky.
I would die.
Are you good at changing your political allegiance based on who is likely to win?
Of course
If I must
I suppose I could pretend.
No, that is dishonest.

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How do you feel about the forthcoming union of England and Scotland?
I'm for it!
I'm OK with it.
I'm not sure.
It's imperialist and bad.
What Elizabethan job would suit you?
Playwright
Lawyer - they made great money then but houses were cheap!
Farrier
Lady of the manor
How surprised would you be to hear that a third of Elizabethan brides were pregnant at their wedding?
I knew that.
Not that surprised
Quite surprised
Absolutely astonished

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Did you know that most brewers and most brothel-keepers in Elizabethan times were women?
Yes, I love it!
I had heard about the brewers but not the brothels.
I knew women worked, but I did not know that.
That is news to me.
What's a great quality in a potential spouse?
Chastity and faith
Financial acumen
Honesty
Kindness
Do you like to read books aloud?
I love it!
I like listening to it.
I find it a little weird.
I only do that for children.

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What instrument do you play?
Piano and harp
Just piano
A little guitar
None
Average age at first marriage was about 25 for women and 27 for men. Is this a good age?
That's the perfect age!
It's a little old.
It's a little young.
Marrying before 30 is a mistake.
Do you know how to dance the Galliard?
Indeed! It is even better than my Pavan.
I know some Scottish reels, so I think they're similar.
I don't know, but I have seen it.
What is that?

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You Got: