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About This Quiz
When was the last time you listened to your dog talk about their problems over a six pack? Can't remember? Well, you may not know your dog all that well. Don't go out and buy a security camera to watch your dog all day. We'll save you the money. Answer these questions to find out how well you know your dog.
What breed of dog do you own?
A Golden Retriever
A Labrador
He's a mix, something like mostly Labradoodle with some Husky in there, I think.
He's a mutt. What mix? I have no idea.
Do you have your dog chipped?
Of course I do! I also have a collar with a chip and my address and phone number on it.
I did, and there's a collar with my number on it.
Chipped? That's so cruel! No!
What do you mean "chipped"?
Do you know what kind of food your dog likes best?
Yes! A special dog food brand I happen to get as a treat.
Yes! It's a class of dog food my dog likes.
My dog likes bickies.
My dog likes shoes.
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Do you know what kind of food your dog likes least?
Yes, because it gives her gas.
Yes, because she always makes a face when I go to give it to her.
Who cares?
I didn't know dogs cared about that.
How do you announce to your dog that a walk is happening?
I say "put on your boots!"
I say "who wants walkies?"
I put a leash on my dog.
I point at the dog door and resume reading the paper.
How does your dog communicate to you he or she needs a walk?
She usually just comes into whatever room I'm in, stands in the doorway, and looks me in the eye for a while.
He usually barks, heads to the front door, and paws at it.
He scratches up the front door.
He just goes on a pee pad.
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Does your dog have a favorite toy you know of?
Yes! A stuffed Simba he snuggles with in his dog bed.
She has a favorite class of toy: Kong toys.
Balls, I think.
I wouldn't know, since I don't buy toys for my dog. My dog is a toy for me!
Does your dog obey you to sit?
Yes, every time
Yes, unless someone else is contradicting me.
Only sometimes
No, but then I assume she was once abused.
Does your dog obey you to fetch?
Yes! It's his favorite thing.
Yes, but only with certain objects.
Not most of the time, unless it's a tennis ball.
No, and I blame the fact that I got her in a shelter.
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Does your dog obey you to drop what is in its mouth?
Yes. She's a good dog!
Usually. He's a good boy!
Not usually, because I've played too much tug of war with him.
She never does, and I think it is because of her breeding.
Does your dog obey you to be quiet?
Of course she does.
Usually, unless he's really excited.
She never obeys me to be quiet, hence the muzzle.
No, and he won't even allow me to put on a muzzle.
Does your dog obey you to shake paws/hands?
Yes, and without any encouragement
Most of the time, yes
It's the one trick he can do.
No
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Does your dog obey you to play dead?
If I have taught it to him, yes.
Most of the time
No
I haven't taught my dog any tricks.
How do you know if your dog is happy?
He bounces around in a circle, then runs up to me to lick me, then repeats.
She wags her whole body and licks me.
He makes a happy bark.
She wags her tail.
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How do you know if your dog is worried?
He sits in front of me, periodically trying to paw at me to get my attention. When I give it, he just looks at me until I cuddle him.
She interrupts me, but walking doesn't make her happy.
She doesn't eat like she usually does.
My dog is never worried.
How do you know if your dog is tired?
He starts to trail behind on walks instead of bounding ahead.
He lays down instead of sitting.
She begs for a short walk, then puts herself to bed.
She goes to bed.
How do you know if your dog is sick?
She doesn't eat and sometimes walks funny.
He doesn't do activities he usually loves.
His stool is strange.
She pukes everywhere.
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How do you know if your dog is sad?
She comes into the living room while I'm watching TV and curls up in my lap, looking up to me periodically until I cuddle her.
He won't immediately eat, looking up to me for encouragement.
She cries.
I didn't know dogs could be sad.
How do you know if your dog is angry?
Her hackles go up, her tail points down, and she sort of coils up to pounce, snarling.
He assumes a defensive posture.
He barks.
He bites me.
Does your dog's mood affect the way he or she follows orders?
Of course, but he will always follow the order regardless.
Sometimes he won't sit.
She doesn't follow any orders, so I have no way of knowing.
Wait, that's a thing?
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Does your dog have a favorite treat?
Yes! And I have it right here! Who's a good boy?
I know several my dog seems to like.
My dog likes anything meaty.
I have no idea.
Does your dog do something you cannot explain?
No. If I see something, I work tirelessly to understand why.
Sometimes, and when that happens I try to understand.
All the time, but that's dogs, right?
Everything my dog does is beyond explanation.
Do you know when your dog is hiding something from you, like a stolen piece of food, or poo in a shoe?
Yes. My dog looks guilty all day.
I can usually smell it.
No, I never have any idea.
What?! My dog is doing what?!
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Do you know when your dog comes to you to show you something interesting?
Yes! She comes, wags, barks, and then turns away, then back again.
Sometimes
Never
My dog brings it in his mouth.
Do you know how your dog likes to be scratched behind his or her ears?
Yes. Three fingers right at the base of the skull.
I don't know for sure, but he sure does love a thorough scratching.
I don't really care. I'll do it to please her, but I don't really pay attention.
She seems to like any kind of scratching.
How many balls are hoarded by your dog right now?
Exactly six
Last time I looked, there were two.
I have no idea.
I don't let my dog have any toys in his bed.
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Could you tell your dog's bark apart from every other dogs' bark?
Of course
That depends on if there are a lot of other dogs of the same breed there.
I don't think so, unless it was directed at me.
Maybe, I don't know.
Do you have a special object your dog likes to be rubbed with?
Yes! He loves the massager.
I know she likes a lot of objects, but I don't know what is the favorite.
I think my dog likes being rubbed with anything, which is gross.
I don't know. My dog hates it when I comb him.
Do you know who in your family the dog likes best?
Yes
I think I do.
I don't really care.
I don't know.
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