Is Your Sex Life Rated G, PG, PG-13, or R?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
Is Your Sex Life Rated G, PG, PG-13, or R?
Image: PeopleImages/E+/Getty Images

About This Quiz

It is impossible to think about subjects like obscenity without thinking of the Motion Picture Association of America, or MPAA. The MPAA was originally created as a sort of pro-film industry organization with a broad portfolio, but with all the hysteria about how certain material could poison American culture, it voluntarily instituted the Hays Code, which was replaced with the current rating system in the late 1960s. 

The movie rating system, which is both voluntary and actively participated in by all the major studios including Netflix, has dozens of very specific rules that decide how "mature" or "adult" material is, and thus, how it must be treated. The most common ratings, which are what we will deal with here, are G for General Audiences, PG for Parental Guidance Suggested, PG-13 for Parents Strongly Cautioned, and R for Restricted, at which point a parent or guardian is required to be present in case they need to explain the more "adult" material in the film.

There are rules that strictly govern this system, like if you say the F word once, you get a PG-13 rating, but say it twice, or once in reference to the act, and you get an instant R; however, as demonstrated with this very rule, there are exceptions. Where do the steamy scenes that make up your sex life sit? Take this quiz and find out.

How many partners have you had, lifetime?
20
I've lost count.
0
6
How often do you have sex (with another person)?
A few times a week
At least 2 times a day
Never
Once a month
Which of these is the most public place you've had sex?
On the roof of an office building
In Times Square on New Year's Eve
In a bedroom in the dark
In a living room with the curtains pulled back

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How often do you take care of things for yourself?
Once a day
Several times a day
Never
A couple times a week
How rough do you like it?
I want some marks
Just short of injury
I like it really gentle
Not too rough, please
Have you ever has sex at your workplace, during business hours?
A couple times, but I had to stop because the drive-through was backing up
Lots of times
No, never
Once, but I thought it was closed

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How many partners did you have by the time you graduated from college?
12
30+
0
4
Have you ever gone past second base in a car?
Just once.
I have done all the things in a car.
I've never kissed in a car!
No, only second base.
What's your safe word?
Peaches
Mondrian
Safe word? What sort of person do you think I am?
Red

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Have you ever been with someone whose last name you didn't know?
I knew it at the time. I can't be sure I remember it now.
I've been with people where I didn't know their first name!
Of course not!
No, I always insist on middle names too, just in case.
What kind of outfit do you consider the height of sex appeal?
A habit
A long gown
A birthday suit
A police uniform
What smell turns you on the most?
My bedsheets
The smell of a locker room after a big game
Perfume
The way people in bars smell

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How many crushes had you had but then completely gotten over by the time you graduated from high school?
Three, on people in my school, but I never acted on them.
All the crushes. I had a crush on everyone!
I never had a crush in high school.
Just the one, on a celebrity.
Have you ever cheated?
A few times but I regretted it.
Once, but that turned into a real relationship.
Never! What do you take me for?
Once, and I still beat myself up about it.
How often do you find yourself reminiscing about sex you had recently?
Frequently
Constantly
Never
Sometimes

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What foodstuffs have you incorporated into your playtime?
Cucumbers
Cream of mushroom soup
Nothing
Peaches
How many blasphemous acts have you done with a partner or partners?
Just 4 or 5
The real question is "how many haven't I done?"
0
Only 2 or 3
Have you ever been with someone your parents would not approve of?
A few times
Many times
Never
Once

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Have you ever had sex in someone else's bed (who wasn't your partner)?
Yes, a friend loaned me a place once.
Yes, including other family members' beds.
No.
Only if you count hotels.
Have you ever kissed someone on a plane?
A few times!
Yes, many times.
No
Only once
How many of your own taboos have you broken?
Many of them
All of them
None of them
Only one or two

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How dirty do you like to talk?
Fairly filthy
I only speak in curse words
I keep it clean
I'll throw in the occasional "damn!"
Are you a bit of a size "enthusiast"?
To a point, but then it becomes like a practical joke
Yes! The bigger the better.
Not at all
Within reason
How embarrassed would you be if your top fetish was made known to your social peers?
I would die from the shame
They all know already, because they've all been a part of it
I might blush a little
I would have to move

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What is the strangest roleplay you've done?
I was a priest
I was the Undersecretary for Agriculture
I've never done anything
I was a boss
What is the most exotic place you've gone for a romantic weekend?
A cabin in the woods
A remote island
A party town
A fancy spa
What body part do you fetishize the most?
Feet
Armpits
Faces
Erogenous zones

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What pet name do you have for your partner?
Honey
Stud
Darling
Boo
What is a good age to get married?
Under 35
Whenever suits both parties!
Under 27
When you meet someone you love!
How embarrassed would you be if naughty photos of you were to leak?
I'd get over it as long as I looked good in the pictures!
Not at all - I posted them myself.
I would never take such images, so I cannot say.
I would be mortified.

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You Got: