What Animal Will You Be in Your Next Life?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
What Animal Will You Be in Your Next Life?
Image: Shutterstock

About This Quiz

If you have a human soul, that means you love animals; and similarly, if you have a functioning soul, you have a distinct chance of that soul showing up on this blue planet of ours more than once.  In many religious traditions, souls take many lifetimes to achieve enlightenment, and the path doesn't lead directly from bug to reptile to mammal to higher mammal to human to nirvana. On the contrary, there are plenty of twists and turns through greater and lesser life forms. Where you land next time around is a product of several factors: your personality and experiences in this life, preferences, how you treat others, and whether you came closer to enlightenment or moved further away.

Fortunately, the wheel of life is very good at helping our wandering souls to find their way to a form that best sets us up to learn whatever it is that was missing from a previous life. If you consistently gave of yourself to others, you might come back as a more selfish creature like a cat. If you were entirely too chilled out, instead of indulging a lazy life as a sloth, you'd probably spend a spell as a busy worker bee. If you were very intellectual, you might learn the joys of being a little less bright in the body of a sheep. Tell us about your life and personality, and we'll see which mortal form best suits you for the next leg of your journey on the path to enlightenment!

How giving are you?
I give until I have nothing left.
I'm no more giving than the next person.
I give, if it's demanded of me.
I don't give anything, ever.
How conformist are you?
I can't be bothered to think about it.
I'm very conformist.
Only a bit.
I conform to no one!
How laid back are you?
Not at all: I'm always watching everyone.
I'm too interested in what is popular to be laid back.
I'm very laid back.
I've got to be on my A game at all times.

Advertisement

How hard do you work?
I work very hard.
No more than the next person.
I don't work very hard.
No one works harder! I dare you to find someone who does!
Do people look to you for help?
They do it all the time. It's exhausting.
Sometimes.
They do it more than I'd like.
No, I've made it clear I'm only looking out for number one.
Do you carefully craft your image?
Not really.
Absolutely!
Not carefully.
Only insofar as I want to intimidate everyone.

Advertisement

Do you ever argue with authority?
No, I am the authority.
Never! That's the road to disaster.
No, I wouldn't want to make waves.
Anyone who thinks they can push me around can go for a long walk off a short pier.
How likely are you to disagree with a loved one?
It's entirely unlikely.
I'll just go along to get along.
It depends on the subject.
It's very likely.
What is your relationship with ball sports?
I applaud other people playing them.
I play them, but not competitively.
I don't play or have an interest in them.
I play them viciously, like my life depends on it.

Advertisement

What single competition sports do you follow?
Darts.
Pool.
Tennis.
Boxing.
What sports did you enjoy when you were growing up?
Softball.
Hockey.
Table tennis.
Wrestling.
What music do you listen to?
R&B.
Top 40.
Classic rock.
Industrial.

Advertisement

What live entertainment do you enjoy?
Musicals.
Team sports.
Magic.
Professional wrestling.
What is your favorite movie genre?
Comedies.
Superhero movies.
Romances.
Sports movies.
What is your favorite baseball team?
The Los Angeles Angels.
The Chicago Cubs.
The Seattle Mariners.
The New York Yankees.

Advertisement

What is your dream car?
A Dodge Durango.
A Toyota Prius V.
A Volvo XC40.
A Ferrari LaFerrari.
Who was the best James Bond?
Pierce Brosnan.
Sean Connery.
Roger Moore.
Daniel Craig.
How house-proud are you?
It's the thing of which I'm proudest.
I'm not very house-proud.
I'm not house-proud at all.
I'm very proud of my house! It's luxurious!

Advertisement

How often do you like to entertain or have parties?
I entertain a few times a year.
I rarely entertain.
I never entertain.
Often, because I get to show off.
How do you get to work?
I take public transport.
I drive.
I walk.
I have someone to drive me.
How would you describe your job?
I work in HR.
I'm in middle management.
I'm a gofer.
I'm the master of all I survey.

Advertisement

Do you like what you do for a living?
I'm fine with it.
I'm secretly unhappy.
I'm openly unhappy.
I love it more than anything!
How ambitious are you?
I'm a bit ambitious.
No more than the next person.
I'm not ambitious at all.
I have towering ambition.
What would you want for your last meal on Earth?
A casserole.
A hamburger.
A salad.
A fat juicy steak.

Advertisement

If you had to wear one clothing label for the rest of your life, what would it be?
DKNY.
JCPenney.
Levi's.
Armani.
What kind of risks do you like to take?
I like to play poker on my phone for monopoly money.
I go to Las Vegas with some friends once a year.
Sometimes I don't bother taking the temperature of my chicken before I pull it from the oven.
Fugu is my favorite seafood.
What is your drink of choice?
Chamomile tea.
Coke.
Starbucks Coffee.
Vodka martini, shaken not stirred.

Advertisement

When you make a decision, how fixated do you get?
I get fairly fixated.
I don't get too fixated.
I don't get fixated at all.
I get 100% fixated.
What podcast do you listen to?
"Serial."
"NPR Fresh Air."
"Freakonomics Radio."
"The Grift."
How would you describe your spirituality?
I'm in it for the community.
I do all the major holidays.
I need to feel comfortable in a mad mad world.
I'm a humanist, in that I'm a human, and I'm the most important thing.

Advertisement

You Got: