Image: Taco Bell via YouTube
About This Quiz
Food and sexy fun times have a long, sordid, delightful history together. Arguably no two desires are more closely linked in our minds and culture than the desire for food and the desire for sex. We use a lot of the same terms to describe them, even. And why not? Both satisfy some of our most basic, primal urges. Both have all kinds of variety, and both can be very plain and simple or indulgent and extravagant. And of course, some people even put both of them together.
So is it weird to suggest maybe that food like Taco Bell has some kind of relationship with your sex life and how you are when your passions get the best of you? We don't think so! In fact, we think it makes so much sense that there's a good chance there's an item on the Taco Bell menu that pretty much sums up your passionate, bedroom self pretty succinctly.
If you can't have fun and laugh a bit in the bedroom, you're probably doing something wrong. Likewise, if you can't unwind and enjoy a taco now and then you're missing out on one of life's simple pleasures. With that in mind, let us know a bit about your love life, and we'll tell you just what Taco Bell menu item you are, deep down inside.
So when you and your special someone decide it's time to get the party started, who takes the lead?
I volunteer as tribute!
It's a joint operation.
Not me
Definitely me
Now maybe you've never used a taco for any sensual fun, but have any other foods showed up in bed?
Who has time for food? Let's just get to business.
I've pulled a few surprises now and then.
I don't like messes.
Oh, you know - strawberries, chocolate, whipped cream, that sort of thing
You can have fun in bed even when no bed is handy! Where else do you like to get sexy?
Anywhere in the house seems good to me.
The shower is always fun.
The bed is really the best place.
Inside, outside, doesn't matter to me.
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When you and your partner are getting into it, do you like to have a soundtrack?
Whatever's in the background already
I have a pretty sexy playlist ready to go.
I don't really like a lot of noise.
I kind of like just hearing my partner.
You know, once upon a time, humans didn't even have houses, so probably everyone was doing it outdoors. Have you ever tried?
You know it.
I have, but I don't make a habit of it.
Never
More than a few times
Do you have a favorite prop you like to bring into the bedroom?
Just me!
I have a little toy box.
No, that's kind of weird.
Just one? Hmm, that's a tough decision.
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There's something to be said for foreplay. Do you enjoy all that build-up?
I kind of prefer getting to the real thing.
Heck, yeah!
As long as it's nothing too freaky
Oh, you need to play a bit first.
Two's company and three's a crowd according to an old saying. Do you agree with that?
Two's pretty good, I think.
Depends on who the third is, I guess.
Yes!
Three, four, five, the more the merrier
What would you do if someone were to walk in on your in the middle of some sexy fun times?
Ask them to go away
I always make sure the door's locked.
I would lose my mind.
It depends on who it is.
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What would you do if you found out your partner had been cheating on you?
We're kind of open, so it's cool.
Well, that'd suck.
We'd be done.
I would ask why I wasn't included.
Do you have an opinion on using restraints in bed?
Seems like a distraction from the good stuff.
I do have some handy.
Why would I do that?
Ooh, fun!
Are you the kind of person who might text a partner some dirty pics now and then?
Anything's possible.
Maybe on a special occasion
Never, you don't know who might see them.
Now and then? I do it all the time.
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When you and your partner are having a night together, would you ever mix it up with some booze or legal smoking herbs to enhance the mood?
Nah, not necessary
If you're partying a little, why not?
No, I like to be clear-headed.
A glass of wine never hurt anyone.
Have you ever been apart from your partner and decided to have a little naughty fun over the phone?
Once or twice, sure
Does Facetime count?
No
You bet.
You know there are some dirty videos on the internet, right? Ever watch them with your partner?
Not with my partner
Once or twice
No
Definitely
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Have you had a serious emotional connection with everyone you've slept with?
Nah, that's not necessary.
I wouldn't say I was in love with all of them, but I at least liked them.
Of course
Nope
Do you have any clothes in your closet specifically to be worn when you're getting intimate with someone?
I thought the point was to take clothes off.
I have a few outfits and costumes.
Not really
I have all kinds of sexy stuff.
Say you're in the middle of having a very, very good time with a partner. Are you going to be pretty vocal about it?
I make some grunty sounds, does that count?
I can get loud.
I try not to do that.
I dirty talk like a boss.
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How important is monogamy to you in a serious relationship?
Not very
I like my partners to be with only me.
Incredibly important
Nothing wrong with an open relationship
Under ideal circumstances, how many times a day would you be having some sexy fun?
I bet once a day would be good.
A few times a week at least
A day? That seems like a lot.
Once, but it'd last the whole day.
Everyone has some kind of fantasy life. Who shows up most in your fantasies?
A celebrity
Friends and coworkers
My partner
Anyone and everyone
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Have you ever accidentally injured yourself while you were in the middle of getting busy?
Yeah, I've hurt myself.
Nothing serious
Of course not
I've had a few mishaps.
If you and your partner are together at a party, would you ever consider sending them secret, dirty texts?
I'd rather suggest we go home and get the job done, if you follow.
Maybe, if I was feeling like being a tease
I wouldn't want anyone to see that.
That sounds fun.
Would you ever sleep with your best friend's ex?
Sure!
Probably not
That's low.
If they were OK with it
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What's the best site or app for picking someone up online?
Tinder
OKCupid
I've never met someone that way.
AdultFriendFinder
Pucker up. How do you lay a kiss on someone?
I really get in there.
Well, that depends on what I plan to do next.
Just a soft, gentle touch
Get ready for tongue
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Are you ashamed of any of the sexual encounters you've ever had?
Yeah, I've made some mistakes.
I'm not proud of everything I've ever done.
I don't think so.
Not in the least
Sex in exotic locations can be very fun. What's the craziest place you've ever gotten frisky?
At work
Outside
The back seat
At a party
What are your thoughts on something like a swingers club where all kinds of people are hooking up?
Sign me up!
I'd need to know a bit more.
No thanks
I've tried it and loved it.
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